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about
I played this song for the first time to my ex and 3 hours later they broke up with me -- this was the day my coincidences started. One of the strangest days of my life involved a prophetic nap dream* (I dreamt that my partner would leave me, I was right), a series of unlikely coincidences involving an angelic uber driver, a neighbor I had never seen on my block, and Mexican food. It was the first day of spring and it snowed, and it changed my life forever. The meaning of the song, the arrangement and production, have all been touched by this new feeling of interconnectedness. I included sounds recorded in the Amazon river to commemorate a trip my ex and I took there together, along with other found sounds from Ecuador.
A song once written about the desire to share love above fear had transformed into a recognition of a universal connection between all things, reiterating with conviction that "every man for himself isn't much of a home."
*in my prophetic nap dream I dreamt that my ex and I were in the jungle and that we had to kill a snake. I knew in the dream that the snake signified our relationship. I was right.
lyrics
I want to go slow
I don’t want to rush in
Quiet down my restless needs
For action,
in opposite
Direction,
from you
And then you pull me
I’m so used to pushing myself
Then you pull me
I’m so used to pushing myself
Oh oh oh did you see me?
I look at you like nobody
Else does
Oh oh oh did you notice?
I say your name,
like my head
Was a loaded gun
Make no mistake
I was born alone
Every man for himself
Isn’t much of a home
Then you pull me
I’m so used to pushing myself
Then you pull me
I’m so used to pushing myself
Oh oh oh did you see me?
I look at you like nobody
Else does
Oh oh oh did you notice?
I say your name,
like my head
Was a loaded gun
credits
released November 14, 2018
Tamar Dart: vocals, guitar, beats, keys,
found sound.
Koof Ibi Umoren: trumpet.
Peter English: bass.
Ruben Gallego: guitar, percussion.
Produced by: Tamar Dart
Mixed & mastered by: Joel Gutman
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